Lay Down Your Life

I John 3:11-24

How would you sum up the message of 1 John in one word? Love, light, truth, life – these are all themes that we have been looking at over the past weeks, and we will continue to encounter them over and over as we move through the second half of this book. John especially emphasizes love: God’s love for us (the foundation of the gospel), our love for God, and our love for each other. 

^"For this is the message you heard from the beginning: We should love one another."  --I John 3:11

In this section that we are looking at today, John gets very specific about what this means. Love is more than a warm feeling, sitting around the campfire singing Kumbaya. Some people are easy to love: family members who care for us, friends who support and encourage us, people we hold up as models of giving and grace. But what about the people who are difficult to love: the people who irritate us or are mean to us, the people who are genuinely evil – what does it mean to love them? I spoke about this last August in my message on 2 John and actually referenced today’s passage back then, if any of you remember that. In any case, it is something we need to come back to again and again. Truly loving is one of the most important – and difficult – things that we are called to do as followers of Jesus. So how does John want us to think about this? 

^"Do not be like Cain, who belonged to the evil one and murdered his brother. And why did he murder him? Because his own actions were evil and his brother’s were righteous. Do not be surprised, my brothers and sisters, if the world hates you. We know that we have passed from death to life, because we love each other. Anyone who does not love remains in death. Anyone who hates a brother or sister is a murderer, and you know that no murderer has eternal life residing in him."  --I John 3:11-15

Do not be like Cain. John goes way back to the beginning, to the first conflict, the first example we have of love missing in a human relationship. It seems like a rather extreme case – are we really at risk of murdering someone else? But John reminds us of what Jesus taught about the link between anger and murder in Matthew 5, the Sermon on the Mount: 

“You have heard that it was said to the people long ago, ‘You shall not murder, and anyone who murders will be subject to judgment.' But I tell you that anyone who is angry with a brother or sister will be subject to judgment. Again, anyone who says to a brother or sister, ‘Raca,’ is answerable to the court. And anyone who says, ‘You fool!’ will be in danger of the fire of hell.--Matthew 5:21-22

As with adultery in the passage that follows this one, Jesus wants to make the point that sin is a matter of what is going on in our hearts and minds, not just in our actions. Cain’s murderous action stemmed from his jealousy of his brother, especially that Abel’s righteousness showed his own separation from God. We don’t know what else Cain was up to, but God was clearly not pleased with him and did not accept his offering – because of the evil in his heart. The murder was just an outward sign that he already belonged to the evil one.

Jesus’ intent was to confront people who thought that murder was wrong, but that anger was really no big deal. Both are unacceptable to God. Jesus takes it one step further and says that even a scornful attitude is worthy of punishment in hell. And how many of us have said, “Raca,” to our brother or sister – or a more contemporary equivalent: you idiot, moron, or whatever. Even if we don’t say the words, do we think them? Usually we are mainly concerned about outward consequences, so we might consider what we think less significant than what we say. I’m not hurting anyone with what I think, am I? But Jesus says that sin is sin, and it separates us from God. He knows every thought in our minds – we can’t hide behind a comparison with a “much worse” sin.

John says once again that the true mark of a Christian is love. When we pass from death to life through the regenerating work of Jesus, He plants his love in our hearts, which allows us to truly love each other. Anyone who does not love remains in death. I imagine we can all think of examples where lack of love has been the death of a relationship.

The faith and righteousness of Abel exposed what was in the heart of Cain – and Cain hated his brother for that. God’s people shine like lights in dark places and reveal the truth of what is going on. They shake things up, just by who they are. People comfortable in the status quo darkness will resent that and will react negatively, perhaps even lash out at the source of the intrusive light. Some will just try their best to ignore the light, to pretend that it doesn’t exist. They stuff their anger at being exposed. These reactions are possible even in the church – they must be, because John is writing this to believers. Before we judge others, we need to examine our own hearts.

If we are shining like lights in the world, we will expose darkness, and the world will hate us for it. John tells us not to be surprised by this. We are in a spiritual battle, and Satan will see us as a threat and do whatever he can to discourage and neutralize us.

Now we move to John’s definition of love, as revealed by Jesus: 

^"This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down His life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers and sisters."  --I John 3:16

For God so loved the world – that He gave us Jesus. Jesus died in our place. He took the punishment that we deserve. And through His death we can have forgiveness of all our sins. God’s love provides us with an escape from His judgment. Notice that Jesus laid down His life. In John 10 He makes it clear that no one is taking it away from Him. It is His own initiative – His own decision. His sacrifice is meant to be an example for us to follow. In the same way, we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers and sisters.

I started wondering about the “brothers and sisters” part of this. Not just the “sisters” part – which the new version of the NIV adds, in an effort to be more inclusive. Incidentally, I think this approach works better in some places than in others. It helps modern readers realize that both men and women were intended to be included in whatever is being said about “the brethren,” but it can obscure the original meaning of the passage in some instances. There is a lot on the internet concerning the pros and cons of using inclusive language in the Bible, if you are interested. I won’t get into more detail here.

What I was actually wondering more about is a potentially narrow definition of “brothers and sisters” (or even just “brothers,” if that’s what your Bible has). Are we supposed to lay down our lives just for other Christians? The Greek word for “brothers” is adelphoi. This word can refer to physical brothers in the same family or other near relatives. It is very commonly used in the New Testament to refer to fellow believers. However, it is also used to address Jews in general, such as when Paul was defending himself before the Sanhedrin in Acts 23. He addressed his accusers as brothers, when they were certainly not fellow believers in Jesus.

We can easily lapse into concern only for those nearest and dearest to us. I find this in my own prayers, where it seems a kind of centripetal force can easily narrow the focus to just the people I am closest to. Jesus, on the other hand, shook up preconceptions about what it means to love one’s neighbor. His story of the Good Samaritan clearly states that love and service need to extend well beyond the boundaries of clan and even nation. While we were yet sinners, Christ died for us. So in following His example, we need to be ready and willing to lay down our lives for anyone.

Still, the reference to brothers and sisters denotes some level of relationship. Laying down our lives is not something to be done at an emotional distance. We need to recognize that the person that we are trying to help is our brother or sister, and then our sacrifice will mean something. 1 Cor 13:3 reminds us that “If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing.” God has the capability of loving the whole world; we don’t. But if we can get the sense of who He wants us to call brothers and sisters, whether they are across the street or on the other side of the world – some may be inside the church and others outside – we can ask for Him to give us His love for them. This is not an emotion that we can or should try to generate by ourselves. In our own strength, we will always fall short of loving the way God wants us to love.

So what does it mean to lay down your life for someone else? The literal meaning is to die so that someone else can live. I was reading last week about Lance Corporal Kyle Carpenter, a Marine from South Carolina, who threw himself on a grenade in Afghanistan to save his friend. It was just announced that he will be awarded a Medal of Honor – just the third Marine to receive one during the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan. He survived, but was horribly disfigured. It has taken more than 30 surgeries to put him back together. He has no memory of the incident, so we don’t know what was going on in his mind during the split second that he had to decide what to do. He instinctively “laid down his life” to try to save someone else.

The other example I think about is the case of the five American missionaries who were killed in Ecuador in 1956 while trying to bring the gospel to the isolated Waodani people. How many of you have heard that story? Because these young men were willing to (in effect) lay down their lives for the sake of that violent, stone-age tribe, there was a breakthrough in reaching them with the message of salvation in Jesus. The blood of the martyrs was indeed the seed of the church. God honors that kind of commitment to love for his sake. For Jim Elliot, one of the men who died, it was a no-brainer. He had written in his journal seven years earlier, “He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to gain what he cannot lose.”

By the way, we have the documentary that was made recently about this incident and what happened afterward. It is a very moving story. The families of the men who died did not abandon the mission. They stayed and kept loving and serving the Waodani for many years as a part of the transformation that came to that tribe. It is definitely worth watching.

We are rightly impressed by such heroism, but not many of us will be called to literally die for someone else. What does it mean for the rest of us? There is that familiar verse in Luke 9 where Jesus says that to be His disciple we need to deny ourselves, take up our cross daily and follow Him. The key is selflessness, the putting of others’ needs before our own. This is not easy to do. It requires a daily battle with our human nature, being willing to die to our own desires, not just taking care of ourselves. Then, we will actually be able to follow Jesus. If we are continually pursuing what we want, what we think is best for us, we will be forging our own trail, not following in the footsteps of the Suffering Servant.

This is how we know what love is: we look at the example of Jesus. It clears away all the mixed up definitions of love that our culture has come up with. Love is never selfish. It is never thinking, What can I get out of this? It doesn’t do things to be recognized and rewarded. Therefore, I think some of the best examples of people laying down their lives for others are ones that we will never hear about – this side of heaven, anyway. People are quietly sacrificing and serving and loving behind the scenes – but God sees them and considers them the greatest in His kingdom.

John follows up with a very practical example of how we can lay down our lives for our brothers and sisters: 

^"If anyone has material possessions and sees a brother or sister in need but has no pity on them, how can the love of God be in that person? Dear children, let us not love with words or speech but with actions and in truth."  --I John 3:17-18

All of us here certainly have material possessions. Let’s ask God to open our eyes to the needs that he wants us to contribute to. As John has stated several times before, if we are not willing to share what we have, then we cannot in good conscience say, “I love you, God.” Everything we have belongs to him anyway, and we are just giving it back to him. Love needs to be very practical. If I say, “I love you,” to my wife and then don’t lift a finger to help her with anything, do you think my words are going to have much meaning to her? We are to love with actions – and in truth. This means that we truly love, not just go through the motions of service with a grudging heart or with the intention of impressing other people. It also means that we don’t avoid confronting real issues. We love in truth by “speaking the truth in love,” as it says in Ephesians 4. Some people mistakenly think that love means never having to say you’re sorry. Isn’t there a song about that even? True love never sweeps things under the rug that need to be brought out in the open and dealt with. We shouldn’t insist on others apologizing, but we do need to be quick to admit it if we are in the wrong.

Let’s carry on with our passage: 

^"This is how we know that we belong to the truth and how we set our hearts at rest in His presence: If our hearts condemn us, we know that God is greater than our hearts, and He knows everything."  --I John 3:19-20

Does your heart condemn you as you read 1 John? I know that I feel pretty inadequate when I think about loving as Jesus loves and laying down my life for others. It is easy to lay a guilt trip on ourselves and worry about not measuring up. Conviction of a particular sin comes from the Holy Spirit and is always accompanied by an offer of grace and forgiveness. We can deal with it and leave it behind. However, a vague feeling of guilt or shame or inadequacy is almost always from Satan wanting to discourage us, to make us think that we are worthless or hopeless. When that happens, we need to remind ourselves that we belong to the truth. We need to receive love and acceptance from God and from other people. God knows us through and through and is passionately on our side. Even if our own hearts condemn us, God is knows what is really going on. He always loves and accepts us when we turn to Him. So our hearts can rest in that. 

^"Dear friends, if our hearts do not condemn us, we have confidence before God and receive from Him anything we ask, because we keep His commands and do what pleases Him."  --I John 3:21-22

These are the kind of verses that some people try to misinterpret to mean that we can get from God anything we want. I am doing all the right things, so thank you, God, I would like a big house and a new car and a happy life. Not exactly. If we are truly keeping His commands and doing what pleases Him, then the things that we ask for will be right in line with what He wants for us. It’s like it says in Psalm 37:4, “Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart.” If we truly delight ourselves in the Lord and have that level of intimacy with Him, then our desires will align with His desires, and He will have no difficulty giving them to us. If we seek first His kingdom, then “all these things” will be added to us – because they will be for His glory. We will receive from Him anything we ask because we will be asking in alignment with His commands and with a desire to please Him. And what is His number one command? 

^"And this is His command: to believe in the name of His Son, Jesus Christ, and to love one another as He commanded us."  --I John 3:23

It is interesting that the first part of this command is not something that we need to do, it is something that we need to believe. This is not about self-effort, gritting our teeth and loving people because that’s what we know we ought to be doing. First, we need to believe. Our love needs to spring from our faith in Jesus. What are we to believe in? The name of Jesus. What does of the name of Jesus mean? It refers to His authority, His power, and His position. When we believe in His name we are recognizing Him for who He is: Almighty God, Lord of creation, Savior of the world, Victor over the Evil One. It is because of who He is and who we are in Him that we are able to love one another as He wants us to. 

^"The one who keeps God’s commands lives in Him, and He in them. And this is how we know that He lives in us: We know it by the Spirit He gave us."  --I John 3:24

The secret of keeping God’s commands is simply to abide. We are saved by grace, and we live by grace, as Emma pointed out in her testimony last week. As we spend time with God, in His word and in prayer, we will better understand what He wants from us. It is a progressive process: as we obey, we understand more and more of what He wants us to do, and we have a greater sense of His presence with us – the power and direction of the Holy Spirit. However, we can stall this process, too, by not keeping his commands. If we don’t obey what we know He wants us to do, then we will have less of a sense of His presence and direction. Then we will be in greater danger of just stagnating in our Christian walk or even getting off on the wrong track. Of course we shouldn’t expect our lives to be just one long spiritual “high.” There may be times when we are doing the right things and God may still seem distant. However, we should still have this deep sense of His Spirit living in us and leading us forward.

So, love one another, following the example of Jesus. This is how we know what love is. Lay down your life for your brothers and sisters. Love with actions and in truth. Have confidence in God and receive from Him anything you ask – as long as it is for His glory. Find the power for all of this by abiding in Him – moment by moment, day by day.